White

My stomach is churning and eyes are watering. I just packed up my room. It is very white again. It is uncomfortable to be in alone, a white island.

On Saturday, I assembled some new IKEA furniture with my roommate—oh, the mighty power of women—and the old sideboards from the living room migrated to my bedroom. That meant that I was packing in, taking the books from my windowsill and putting them into the lockers, storing all the stacks of posters and pamphlets I have been shamelessly accumulating the past few months. Everything looked so seamless, so Swiss. I avoided thinking that I would be unpacking these same things and repacking them into my suitcase in less than a week, transforming back into an American Tourister, "like none of it ever was real."

This week has been difficult, my mind teetering on departing thoughts, as well as arriving again in Cincinnati. Wrapping up projects and writing cards; quite honestly, I don't have anything profound to say. My mind is racing so fast that it is blank, one big white blur.

Research shows that white can symbolize death. Some things that needed to be in my killed in my life have died in the past two weeks. This was painful, is painful (who am I kidding, the pain won't be over for awhile), but it was the right thing to do. White is also purity. Because of this death (and His death), I am pure, even if I don't feel like it. And purity can bring peace. I can't wait for this one. I am white, and I am ready for peace.

Welcome Amanda.

No Coat Weather

As consistently tends to be the case, I will write later. It was a beautiful day in Basel and Basel-Land today, in the mid 50s! Love. 

Both Sides Now—Joni Mitchell

Rows and floes of angel hair

And ice cream castles in the air
And feather canyons evrywhere
Ive looked at clouds that way

But now they only block the sun
They rain and snow on evryone
So many things I would have done
But clouds got in my way
Ive looked at clouds from both sides now
From up and down, and still somehow
Its cloud illusions I recall
I really dont know clouds at all

Moons and junes and ferris wheels
The dizzy dancing way you feel
As evry fairy tale comes real
Ive looked at love that way

But now its just another show
You leave em laughing when you go
And if you care, dont let them know
Dont give yourself away

Ive looked at love from both sides now
From give and take, and still somehow
Its loves illusions I recall
I really dont know love at all

Tears and fears and feeling proud
To say I love you right out loud
Dreams and schemes and circus crowds
Ive looked at life that way

But now old friends are acting strange
They shake their heads, they say Ive changed
Well somethings lost, but somethings gained
In living evry day

Ive looked at life from both sides now
From win and lose and still somehow
Its lifes illusions I recall
I really dont know life at all
Ive looked at life from both sides now
From up and down, and still somehow
Its lifes illusions I recall
I really dont know life at all

Did Ye Go To Dublin, Or Arrrr Ye a Pirate?

Been a total slacker with postings this quarter. Quite honestly, I have had a lot of opportunity this week to post, but have conceded to sleeping, or kidding myself into thinking I could watch A Few Good Men, and then sleeping. I "can't handle the truth" that I don't give my body enough time to catch up.

Went to Dublin this past weekend for a nice getaway with Basel friends—nie—friends. I can't classify people as "Cincinnati friends" and "Basel friends." They are all my friends, location insignificant. So yes, Cedric, Laura, Melanie, Daniel, Marco, and I travelled from Basel to Zurich to Dublin, and got to spend some serious quality time together, time that cannot be hindered with exam and work schedules. They even tolerated me saying, "Emmentaler!" instead of  "cheese!" which was great.

I can't really explain what I thought Dublin would be, but I don't really think it matched my stereotypical expectations. It was so much smaller than I imagined! It felt a lot like Philadelphia, actually. I had some pretty pleasant interactions with the Irish I did meet, and I enjoyed the relaxed atmosphere. 

The first evening, after unloading at the hostel, we went to a traditional Irish restaurant, and I had lamb, I think. I don't know if that is a traditional dish, but it was on the menu and it sounded good. I cannot tell you how thrilled I was to get the menu, and be able to READ it! I thought I might be of some help to my non-native speaking friends, but they totally held their own, even with the strong accents. Sometimes I even found myself ignoring people; I wasn't doing it on purpose, I am just accustomed to never understanding. One thing I did take advantage of: breaking the law and walking even if there wasn't a green man. I am really getting sick of the Swiss following this law all the time, mainly because I just feel so dumb standing at the intersection when there are CLEARLY no cars coming. Not even an ever-sly tram to creep up on you. Crossing the street on red... I have such a rebellious soul.

Went to a bar with Gael Force, a somewhat cheesy but altogether fun band who played traditional Irish music. He pulled Melanie and Daniel on the stage to do some singing renditions, which was great to watch (and thank God I wasn't chosen). The music made me reminisce of Titanic and the third class party on the lower decks that Jack and Rose escape to. During one of the songs, I couldn't resist the urge to get up, grab an arm and do a little swinging to the music. If only I could rise up on my toes (and have such a great dress as Rose to go bar-hopping in!).

Friday we did some explorations of the city, after an unruly bacon, ham, egg, toast, instant coffee breakfast. I found this beauty. I just love this color.

Went to a natural history museum and saw some dead, fossilized human bodies, and had really one of the best latte macchiatos I have had in a long time. Went to St. Patrick's Cathedral, and was deeply disappointed that they were charging ADMISSION to the church itself. It is normal for a church to charge a fee to climb their spires, but it is just wrong to charge admission to the sanctuary. I refused to pay admission, and preferred to be outside and watch the Harry Potter children leaving from the choir academy across the street. Honest, it looked like Hogwarts had come to life, and all of the beautiful little redheads came pouring out in their plaid and sweaters. Then headed to the Guinness factory. Such an impeccably designed exhibition! Even if I didn't like the beer (stout), which I do, I would still love this factory sheerly for the design. They showed us how it is made, the advertising history, and of course, sampling. I know this photo means nothing to you, and shows you nothing, but I like it, and I took it in the factory.

At the top of the exhibition, you receive your complimentary Guinness, and are able to overlook the city while you drink a ridiculous amount of calories. I didn't think I really liked dark beers, and I am really more of a wine person, but I did enjoy this beer.

Here is just something fun:

That evening we went to a few different pubs, and I was able to get my Irish coffee. Perfection. 

I think the best thing about seeing all of these different pubs was being able to see all the different types of architecture, and how their live music seemed to fit them perfectly. There was a clearly Jugendstil bar with more lively, free-flowing music, and my favorite, a small room in the second story that felt a lot like a secret, and had some fiddle action. I loved this place. The second night we came back and there was a duo that played American bluegrass/blues. I have never heard such a mean "blues harp." 

One of my priorities while I was here was to get the new U2 CD, specifically from their hometown of Dublin. There were a lot of posters around announcing the album, and every record store was fully stocked. I caved, and bought a lot of U2 CDs. My excuse: "But it is so cheap here!" 

Went to the sea on Saturday, to Howth and Dun Laodhaire. I would describe the area as the Hamptons with a more down-to-earth and European charm. We went to a restaurant for lunch that was stone-walled with fireplaces in every room. I wanted to be snowed-into this building. I had to have a cup of coffee in this atmosphere. And soup.

The girls took a nice long nap on these rocks as the boys explored the city. It was so relaxing to bask in the sun, hear the seagulls, and soak up the lapping of the water. There was a beautiful layered cake of rocks, seaweed, and barnacles. This was one of my favorite moments on the trip.

As the weekend was coming to a close, I had to deal with a lot of red tape to get back from Ireland and re-enter Switzerland. At each checkpoint (at check-in, at boarding, at customs) I was asked to show some sort of proof of intent to enter Zurich, some sort of request or train ticket or something. I have never been so on edge about entering a country. I guess I somehow deserve it as an American, since our borders aren't difficult to get through either, but when traveling with a group of Europeans, I felt a bit discomforted to be hassled all the time. I cannot tell you how thankful I was to set foot back into Switzerland, past the customs gate. As we were grabbing a bite to eat in Zurich before heading back to Basel, Marco commented, "Ah, it feels so good to be home. Oh...sorry." But I told him there is really no need to apologize. Because when I do set foot in Basel, coming out of the train station and looking towards the park, I do get an "at home" feeling. I am comfortable here. Somehow, I am a Basler. 

I am so thankful for this opportunity to jet-set to Ireland, to be living in Europe for a time. I have grown inexplicably. 

I am not avoiding writing about Fasnacht, but clearly I have a lot to say, and even this weekend post has gotten massive. I want to give full respect to all that is Fasnacht, so I will save it for a time when I can do it justice. 

My Science

Sick but Smiling

So much has been happening in the last few days, that if I don't write, I will totally regret it. So. Here I am! Listening to the new U2 CD and totally thrilled with it.

Here is a story that happened a few weeks ago, but I want to tell. There is a restaurant on my way home that is just full of Giacomettis, probably 20 or 30 of them. I always look into the windows of this restaurant as I walk, because they are just beautiful, and I am still astonished that they aren't locked up in a museum somewhere; no, they are in a corner pizza place, and everyone can enjoy them. So one day I walked by the first window, and a busboy was walking with a carrier of glasses, and we saw each other. Then brick. Walked by the next window, and the boy was there again, and turned his head, and we looked at each other again. Brick. Walked by the next window, and the boy and I were just laughing and laughing. Brick. Walked by the next window, and I was alone. I stopped, looked for the boy, at the Giacomettis, and then he popped from around the corner, having changed pace on purpose. So so simple. So so amazing.

Thursday I took a visit to the pharmacy on Spalenberg. Literally, this was a step back in time;  the wall were covered in wooden drawers with small labels on brass fixtures, and rows and rows of bottles with blackletter script, that for all I know said "Witches' Toes." I went up to to counter, wanting to get some aspirin, and the woman looked at me like I was nuts. "Have you ever taken aspirin before?" she said with a concerned face. I said yes, that it wasn't a problem, but she insisted on telling me to only take one every six hours, because they were so strong. I should have told her that I am from America, and that I can handle pretty much everything she had behind that counter, none of which was maximum strength or anything beyond herbs with a little chemicals mixed in. When I got the aspirin, it was packaged totally Swiss-like, beautiful type and solid color fields. Beautiful packaging, totally ineffective medication. 

Came home that evening, exhausted, and getting sicker by the hour with a bad sore throat. Woke up in the morning on a bed with no sheets (fell asleep mid-laundry), and some herbal medications by my door from my neighbor and roommate: cough lozenges from Zürich that are black and chewy; a cough syrup that is literally caramel, and puts Dimetapp or Robitussin tastes to shame; throat medicine that tastes like Fisherman's Friends; cough and bronchial herbal tea; and Vicks. The room was spinning, my body couldn't decide whether it was hot or cold, and I knew that I needed to call in sick, and with my barely-there voice and nonsense thought patterns, my boss was completely sympathetic. The morning was absolutely stunning, bright and sunny, and I was stuck in and out of sleep inside. I tried to be somewhat productive, but I just couldn't concentrate, and resorted to Seinfeld instead. Watched Ocean's 12 that evening, and had no problems falling asleep yet again that night.

On Saturday, I got up early, took a quick trip to the flea market with Bruno, a photographer friend of Melody's staying at the apartment. It was cool to speak with him. We talked about a lot of things, but it was especially interesting to discuss the "first date" concept, and how that really doesn't exist in Switzerland/Europe. He thinks that there are less mind games here, but I am not convinced of that. We then went back home because I was scheduled to be a portrait subject for my roommate's photography class; her 8 students photographed me in my bedroom, trying to tell my story via photo. It was a lot of fun, but also very tiring. Each of them had 40 minutes to do what they wanted with me. I really enjoyed getting inside their minds, and seeing their approach to a subject they had never met, but still had to depict in truth. It was cool when they would let me get involved, and throw in my own ideas, or be encouraging, because it was really intimidating. It was helpful to be on the other side of the camera, because now I have a better understanding of how to direct my own subjects. I haven't received all of the photos yet, and in all honesty, I think I would be really creepy to post them, so if you are interested (and I like them, haha), I will show them to you sometime. Here was an impromptu from a photographer of my roommate and I at the shoot:

My friend Sam arrived from München, and after the shoot, we went on a long walk along the river and around the city. Melody prepared dinner for all of us, and it was great bonding time, with no cameras involved. Afterwards, Sam, my neighbor, and I watched "Wetter Das..." a show that apparently has a huge following. It is a sort of betting show, where contestant guests with a certain talent need to complete a task, and celebrities bet against them. After the guests do the bet, the loser has to do some sort of weird or embarrassing act. One of the bets I saw were horn players that had to play Jenga, removing the blocks by blowing them out. These guys were amazing! And they successfully built 10 extra stories in something like 10 minutes. So the celebrities lost and had to do some gymnastics. I don't think I would've watched it if I was flipping channels in the States.

Afterwards, went to a party with Bruno and Sam that was near to the apartment. Spoke with an architect and her husband. She happens to work for H+dM, and she claims there are no stalker emails going around about me, so that is good. Met a woman names Arian, and had some interesting discussions about Swiss culture. She said that she could not live in the States, and her reason was because of the death penalty being legal. I found that as an intriguing answer to the question. 

Totally exhausted. Will write about Fasnacht and other current festivities in the near future. Here are a few pictures that I will explain later. Until then, good night.